Adventures in Tulsa- Final Day

 Sunday morning we wake up at L's friends house about 10:30am. The plan was to be at our spot by 8am but on the way home last night I insisted that was a haneous idea and I would definitely kill someone if I had to get up that early. We get in gear and hop in the car. I agreed to be the DD again. I actually like being the DD because I really don't like being drunk and I'm such a light weight that even if I drink half of what my friends drink I get smashed.

We jam out to 90's music the whole way up as well as a little bit of Say Anything. The scenery was beautiful and I hardly noticed the 2 hour drive at all. We arrived to our stop to go floatin'. Beers in hand, water shoes on, and nothing but our bathing suits. We go to pay for our raft and this cute guy with this scruffy beard helped us out. He was super sarcastic and I couldn't help but flirt with the guy...I mean really it should be a crime to not engage with the opposite sex if they're flirting with you and as single as I am... (Not ashamed at all. Actually my favorite quote from 90210 yesterday was "Do you wanna be a strong woman? Or just the girl who got the guy?"... All growing up I was "the girl who got the guy". I've been LOVING my independence and freedom while in college!)

Anyway we all board this gross hot muggy school bus. The other people on the bus are very...well... Oklahoma. They're talking about marshmallow baseball and a few of them don't have teeth in places that should have teeth. My friends start drinking beer already as we drive up the mountain to eventually float back down to our cars. Once we get in our raft we start floating down. The water was so shallow though that many a time we had to get out and walk or use our oars but mostly J would get out and pull us.

There were tons and tons of people on the river, smashed out of their minds. It was like being at a frat party taking place on a river! (Well I've never been to one, but I've seen movies of them. Yes I know, I live in a whole blah blah blah). There were the "Asians" as J named them, a group of many mixes of people yes mostly asian, who had 5 rafts and SO much alcohol. They said J could be an honorary asians by taking 13 shots. crazy. They had buckets of margaritas with nozzles that they would pour into people's mouths.

Then there were the "That's awesome" guys. Where everything we said  was "awesome". Ugh I need to delete that word form my vocabulary. Then as L and M proceeded to get drunker they found some guys. M got "River Married" to one guy while L convinced all the other guys that she was British. She put on an accent that was somewhere in between Cockney, British, with some Irish vocal tones and of course slipped into her southern California accent constantly but everyone was too drunk to notice. Eventually it's me sitting in the middle of the boat while M is making out with her river husband and L is making out with J and I'm sober as Santa and wanting to kill myself. Seriously...a 5th wheel?! When is this thing over?!?!? Little did I know just how far it was from being over...
This old woman who either lost 100 pounds in a week or had a terrible lipo-suction job starts talking to M. She's in a two piece and it's terrifying. Really nice woman- trashed as hell- but her skin was sagging SO FAR DOWN she had to tuck it into her bathing suite. It seems M is trying to convince this woman she's a lesbian when she begins walking away from the boat doing her own thing. L is off somewhere on the river while J and I are in the boat. Eventually L comes back and passes the F out on the boat. We can't find M.

We stop the raft on an edge for about 15 minutes but none of us see her. So we decide to proceed to the end and meet her at the bottom. It's now been hours since we've seen M. We get to the end area and turn in our rafts and life jackets. It's 6:30pm...we started at 12:30. The group before us told L that they pulled a dead girl out of the river the other week. Now L is freaking out hoping M ins't so smahed she passed out and is floating down the river somewhere.

I point out this hottie girl we passed multiple times down the river. While I was pointing her out to L and M  I think gosh everyone on that raft is super hot, who is that floppy girl hanging on the bottom of the boat floating around? That's so embarrassing...she must be super drunk swinging around the the river like that...wait- M?!? We all start yelling her name--- but she is shit-faced! Finally the other (rather sober) hotties point us out to her. When she notices she flops into the water, bathing suite falling off, tits everywhere, and we have to drag her out of the water. She's yelling F.U. every other second. Then slurs, "don't touch me I'm fine". Immediately after this thought of hers she dives head first into the gravel, legs still straight on the floor as if she's some weird bird digging for worms. She stands back up, still yelling she's fine and F us and my sassy mouth blurts, "um...M you've got some dirt. On your face."

I couldn't handle it. Everyone is wasted...I barely know this girl and she's such a shit show and M and J are also drunk. Gimmie a person in crisis, or being bullied, or even just mad over something petty and annoying I'm totally there for them- but i have no tolerance for drunk people, I guess it's my alkalies heel.  As this is happening, Beard from earlier that day came to talk to me. We got to flirt and chat some more, there's the light in the darkness. He probably wouldn't have come up to me if I backing away from my friends. We finally get M in the car as she's sobbing about needing her River Husband. She wants to stay at the river. As we're driving she breaks out of the car and is trying to beat L. L is holding her with all her might, much more sober now, though still drunk as hell, and once they stumble out of the car, I"m so ready to hit someone that I drive away with J to a gas station to cool down. I go to grab something delicious when I remember that lady and grab a V8 instead. I'm such a bitch. oops. sorry bout' it.


L get's M back in the car. J and I wanna drug her, or hit her so she passes out but L isn't down (obvi- that was a terrible idea and simply our emotions speaking). L and M pass out while J and I listen to some chill acoustic music as the sun begins to set. After about an hour we pass a corn field. L and I need to go run in it. I pull over. And we sprint straight into the corn running faster and faster. The wind brushing my hair, the sun setting in the background and the stalks brushing my hands. I go back and forth between thinking of all the scary movies I've ever seen that trigger dead little girls popping out at me and living in the moment which was simply thrilling and beautiful. I recommend everyone in their life time run through a con field. It's exhilarating!

We drop off M. And go to a famous diner off route 66 for some french fries. We recap the whole day and are laughing hysterically, so over tired, and exhausted we can't make real sentences or act like real people. We are utterly delirious.  I haven't laughed that hard in a while. We go home- pass out and then I leave in the wee hours of the morning. Next Stop- Shelter Island, NY!!

Tulsa Adventures Day 3

While I was at the Gypsy Cafe, I saw a piano. I miss having a piano at home so I asked one of the workers if I could play.
"As long as it ain't chop steaks or no fur elise go right on ahead"....obvi....

I began to play and felt like myself even deeper. No matter how much I love the simple life, I love art more. I called my brother to talk some facts about our trip abroad. We think Venice, Florence, Rome, then train on over to Spain for a two week trip.

I left the cafe to walk around a bit, feeling ancy since L just dropped me off at the Cafe while she went to work and it had been a few hours. Feeling a little bit like a hooker in my cowboy boot, highwaisted shorts and see-through red tank tucked in, I began to walk down the Highway towards downtown. I saw in the Distance PAC, the Performing Arts Center. A friend had commented on one of my instagram photos saying she was in a show in Tulsa, so I went in to see if it was hers. I sneak into the dark theater, go down the steps making sure no one is there, or see's me. I try a few theater looking doors. Locked. Then I hear a singing voice that has to be S's voice, I know that voice anywhere!!! The last door I try. Open! Sure enough my friend is playing the lead in Gypsy and is singing on stage while the tech crew improves the cues. I quietly sit in the back and watch for about an hour. I just love theater! I sneak backstage, meet all her super nice cast-mates and then creep into the wing and wave to her as she waits for her next appearance.  Once she's off stage we embrace- both saying, "What? this is so crazy!!" L calls and says she's outside, so I run off and wish her best of luck with the show!!

J, M, and L pick me up in the black PT cruiser and we go off to lunch at Sweet Lily's for some good southern cookin'! I'd been eating nothing but healthy since I'd got there....so it was about time to actually taste some home grown life! "When in Tulsa..." So I got fried catfish, with fried okra, sweet potatoes, mac n' cheese and banana pudding. L and I split it of course (so much food) with some pink lemonade, which I swear was only sugar and water...

I asked what we were doing tonight, and they said it was a surprise. And I LOVE surprises!!!! We start driving around and then see a house for sale for 16k...WHAT?!?! We pull over to go look at it. All four of us are really into flipping houses so we we're thinking about all of us going in on it. We get to the house and it wasn't in bad shape at all. Between the four of us we could all pitch in and fix it up. But once I learned how low we could charge for rent, $800, that split 4 ways was NOT worth the work the house needed, so I opted out. Don't get me wrong I'm all about passive income, but since I wouldn't be there often enough it didn't seem worth it. My ticket there and back was $500 alone...which wouldn't even equal my share of the property. But I think they still might buy it. Property is the best money investment I think. I'd rather have my money in a house than in a bank- any day.

We leave to go to my surprise. I think J just has to drop off some papers at his work till I'm handed headphones and we walk towards the plane!!! I start FREAKING out! I'm so excited and nervous and crazy!
"Wait what? No- Seriously? Ah Guys!! NO NO NO!! This is insane! You're flying us? Can you fly us? We're gunna die!"...I proceed this screaming as I slowly begin doing downward dog to upward dog on the cement floor,in my cowboy boots and shorts, as my friend crack up at my hysteria.

He checks all the different things on his list to make sure everything is in order. We all hop in. I ask" Is there a wait limit- like is this okay for all four of us to be in this little thing"
 L says, " That's why I asked you how much you weighed"...which was such a relief cause I thought she was just judging my appearance! haha
We take off so smoothly and glide into the air. Way smoother than a commercial plane. J talks in his intercom using pilot talk (so cool) and we soar over the lake. As we fly the sun is setting. Never have a seen a sunset from a better view.  This sunset beats the one I saw from the cliffs the day prior. We soar around for about an hour and a half. It's breath taking and peaceful. My mind is clear and calm.
We land. I'm so impressed by his skills and so thankful for my friends planning such an amazing experience for me! J and M only just met me and yet are treating me with such kindness. It was crazy fun!




After this we all go to Walmart to get some water shoes and Beer for our adventure the next day. Then we go over to J's friends house for a traditional college type kick back. With burgers and hot dogs, chips and beer, then of course a blazing fire pit in the back we begin to meet about 15 new people. There was one boy I had my eye on because his eyes were GORGEOUS and he had a pretty good sense of humor. We all chat and laugh around the table till some says- let's play what was it pong, ping pong, BEER PONG that's it. Eyes was on my team and we played against J and L. Eyes and I actually made a super good team. Side note: these people sport A LOT of high fives. Seriously, i was high fiving people the whole week, and ESPECIALLY at this party...so strange. Okay anyway. We get the death cup by him first getting a ball in then as J picks up the cup to drink it I get my ball in and Instantly win!! Then the rest of the guys come inside and we play a game of flip cup, 5 on 5. And my team wins again best out of 4 (oh yes with plenty of high fives).  I may or may not have gotten a little tipsy and ended up kissing Eyes all night. Who knows. And it may or may not have been in the backyard with the beautiful fire, tree's surrounding us, and a gorgeous starlit sky... Who knows? I don't kiss and tell...

Tulsa Adventures, Day 2

Sitting in Gypsy Cafe with a soy late and Avacado salad, I begin to reflect on my second day there.

After the now morning routine of getting Lula-May then meeting L at her leasing office for coffee, she says she's going to take me to one of her favorite food spots, Lola's. It's a cute lil' place that does all it's food from a glammed out trailer. There are little round tables surrounding it. After ordering our delicious salads, an old man and his son begin to play some country music right next to us with their fine looking K9 chillin' in the sunshine.

Next we hop in the car to her favorite thrift store owned by a tiny old lady. I swear I felt like Cameron Diaz and Christina Applegate in " The sweetest thing" when they go into that thrift store in the middle of no where. I find an awesome beaded belt and new maroon boots for only $20. We say our goodbyes after our conversation with her about opening our own thrift shop and head back to the office since L is now an hour and a half late haha.


J met up with me at the office so he could take me to Utica, a rich part of town. We walked around the outlets for a second (just long enough for me to get a Starbucks-duh) until we find our way into the neighborhood. The houses are gorgeous! Huge and each one unique and special. Tons of plants and flowers surrounding each little cottage.  I never tire looking at real-estate, it's just too mesmerizing. It made me think about possibly moving to Brooklyn...what?!?!? I know Jillene + Brooklyn= Impossible if you know me. However, I've learned how much space, greenery and light are to me. I thought they didn't matter but they truly take a toll on my well being. I did just sign my Lease for up until April, but I may just have to break it because I need some more room if I'm going to stay in NYC.

J and I picked up L while jamming out to one of my favorite artists, Lights, to go to the farmers market. We get some blueberries, snap peas, tomatoes, cucumbers and egg plant for dinner and snacks. J says he's going to take us to Chancelor Park. But once we get their, he has L and I drop off our car and get into his for a little adventure. We hop in the car and he goes out of the park back into the highway then all of a sudden turns INTO the forest. It's terrifyingly thrilling! Our car is bouncing back and forth all over the place as he navigates his way through the tree's and foliage. As the tree's clear there's an opening to a cliff. He get's closer and closer to the edge of the cliff till we're screaming and pulling his shoulders-STOP!!!!! We hop out of the car to see,  the most beautiful view of the city! All of the tree's and the bright sun, the open space, it's glorious. One of the moemnts you want to freeze forever.

After we got our fill, J went to Volleyball  while L and I continued to explore the forest. Again realizing the time has slipped we race back home to get ready for the "fashion show" we were invited to.  It's hard to tell when you're running late here because the sun is up at 5am and doesn't set till 9pm.  L makes some yummy chickpea spicy tacos for dinner and then we get ready.  We get to the Club this fashion show is taking place in, having no idea what to expect, and emerge into a whole new world. Everyone is artsy and beautiful. Not in an LA or NYC way- but a whole different breed of artsy beauty, a Tulsa breed. There's beautiful clock like jewelry, provocative paintings, and woman in stilettos (which isn't a regular thing here in Tulsa).

Then a curvy girl with a guitar starts jamming out and I melt. She's brilliant. A mix of Adelle and Alanis Morissette.  Her passion, soul and range is breathtaking. Her pain and grunge in her voice consumes me. I wish I was a producer so I could sign her and give her a tour. Then the fashion show starts...which is the only part of the extravaganza that's truly a joke. The clothes worse than Limited Too and the girls beautiful yet so awkward, I question if they've ever worn a pair of heels in their life. Too much to bare, so L and I step outside to get a drink and her friend "Richy Rich" shows up (at least that's what I'm gunna call him).  He's witty, outspoken, and hilarious- seems like he should be a character in Gossip Girl. We bounce on out to the bar next door. There are so many attractive straight men I'm overwhelmed! But why are they always SO BORING?! Can't a guy have brains AND a bod for a change?

Again we leave this bar and drive on downtown (I haven't had a drink and declare myself the DD). As we drive trying to figure out where to go, Richy Rich says he used to work at Mayo and can get us in. We both scream: hell yeah! We tried to get in the previous night but it was closed. Mayo is a beautiful fancy smancy rooftop bar. When we get there, it's closed-AGAIN- but Richy pulls some strings and get's us up there with free drinks. It's gorgeous with a huge neon sign saying MAYO at the top. His friend comes and sits down with us. I'm gunna call him TFB (TrustFundBaby). TFB is apparently the president of what was it...Rico? Ricard? REPUBLIC!  They distribute Absolut Vodka and other really nice liqueurs. We talk about life and traveling and get to know each other better. Richy Rich talks about his dad, recently deceased, being so wealthy that he never really had to work. He would go to Florida and spend $9,000 on drinks in 15 minutes. Money was not an object. The more both guys spoke of their money the more grossed out I was. Seriously? Could you be a bigger deuce? Money is not gunna impress me [muc-oh oh ooohhh]...I'm around money- I get it, whatever, how about being a stellar human being? I'm so ready to go when TFB invites us to his apartment (inside the hotel). Who lives inside a hotel?! I had to see it.

We enter and it is the epitomy of a bachelor pad. From the huge alcohol bar to the beercap stools seats. As they talk more and more about their various favorite designers: Gucci, Louis Vuitton,  Coach etc... I blurt
"Gee I just really love Target!"
They freeze. Until Richy Rich says-
"Wow we've been such dicks, sorry about that". I give a sharp smile.
 Richy Rich says, "you two wanna go"?
 L and I say in perfect Unison: YES.

We drop off Richy Rich. He doesn't have a car because his dad's fourth wife got all the money once his dad died in a sudden heart attack with no will. The family is currently in a lawsuit trying to get back the various assets but until then, nothing.

Once he's out of the car L and I laugh the whole ride home about how ridiculous that night was.  Another crazy and exciting day in Tulsa! What could possibly come tomorrow? I promise it's even crazier!

Tulsa Adventures, Day 1

I pack my back pack up and leave for JFK. Of course i buy the new Taylor Swift album to listen to! I"m wearing my cowboy boots and am ready to go! The butterfly won't stop as I board the airplane. I think, gosh I'm really crazy?! who buys a ticket for Tulsa in the middle of the night for fun? But it was one of the best decisions i have ever made. This trip was immensely fulfilling!

After arriving late Tuesday night and sharing delicious Italian Nachos (chips with marinara, cheese, and Alfredo) with L and her new boy we went back to her adorable apartment and I crashed.

I awoke in L's quaint and cozy room under her red Egyptian Cotton sheets. I felt so comforted by the space of the room compared to my closet of a room in the city. She had already left for work so I had the morning to mozy. I open the bathroom door to let out Lula-May, her new puppy that would not stop following L till she took her in, out to play. She is the CUTEST lil' thang!

I put Lula-May on her hot pink leash and walk over to L's leasing office for some coffee. I meet her co-worker/ new friend M and learn all about her new cleanse she's doing...it didn't seem like something that would be too effective but hey- not my body, go ahead and eat only cantaloup all day.

As each new person stepped into the leasing office I was inspired to write a play based off of them. Tulsa people are CHARACTERS! My favorite though have to be Jesse and Joe. They're the AC guys, very young. Joe is round, in his 20's with a darling mile and bashful way about him. Jesse is built, attractive, and slightly resembles Channing Tatum  gone country. They procede to tell me what "noodling" is...

I'm sorry what?
-Ya knoe-w, noodlin'!
No, I"ve never heard of that, ever.
-Well what I do is, I stick my hand in a whole in tha river until a huge catfish bites it. Then I go and wrestle it out of that whole till he's out! Look at this picture and ma scars on ma arm!
[I simply shriek]
(The catfish is HUGE- like as tall as me, it's disgusting. Regardless of this noodling, this Jesse character is Healthy Fit! [aka super fine])

We leave the leasing office to go to lunch at Elote, where they have a boxing match in the center. Very strange. We have delicious Mexican Food. After this J, L's new boy takes me to go to a museum and see the beautiful gardens in the back. It's majestic! It takes my breath away. We sit in the garden for an hour and chat. Turns out he's been flying airplanes since he was 15years old and is actually from Long Island but went to school in Oklahoma.  The more he speaks the more his high intelligence is revealed. Very, very smart guy.  He's calm and collected yet very positive. He's easy to be around and great to talk with.  The more we spoke of traveling the more I realized how much of the world I haven't seen and need to see! My brothers and I are planning now to go to Spain and Italy in September. I've just got to see the world! If I'm already obsessed with Oklahoma, what more is out there?!

We pick up L and rent some bikes to go biking down the river. It's hot and sticky, but the breeze from the bike's keep me going. The tree's and water and fresh air are delicious. 

After this we go to an adorable coffee shop called Shades of Brown where I get a dirty chai.  The art was awesome and the whole feel of the place very artsy. We realize the time then race home to get changed.

We arrive in downtown Tulsa to a bar called Crystal Pistol. They have Hard Cider (I can actually drink this because it's gluten free...) and we go out side in the back to see J's friends band play. They're so fun!! They're like a mix of Ben Folds and Relient K. L and I are making ourselves have so much fun, dancing and singing along. Every one else is staring at us and the band staying seated or with their arms crossed. But you only live once, right? LIVE LIFE UP! The next boy comes on, very timid but funny. Sounds like JT and plays like John Mayor. We stay for his set because it was nice easy listening.


 Then L and I hear music coming from the bar next door. A Psyschobilly/ Ska Band with a huge punk following. We stand out a lot but race in to the bar to start dancing with everyone for their last two songs.  L is pretty drunk as we walk back with J to the car. We walk through the Hyatt where she drunkenly steals a red velvet pillow of theirs and it's just too funny to stop her. We get back to the apartment, and crash.

Such a fun filled day, meeting new people, listening to awesome music- how could anyone say this place was boring? Any place can be full of life and adventure...life is what you make it!
(Scroll down for a clip of the Tulsa Band we heard!!)